New Orleans Hash House Harriers

Hash No. 978

The Hash in which a Hare got Lost

Hares: Popeye,  Butt Gravy

Date:  23 April 2007

Venue:  Jefferson Highway

Near The Huey Long Bridge

ten miles upstream from the

French Quarter

In New Orleans, Louisiana

 

The Trail:

On a Monday evening in perfect weather as had been the case for over a month the pack set out in pursuit of the two hares from the back carpark of Academy Sports at  junction of Jefferson Highway and the landing of the big bridge over the Mississippi River.

The flour trail led the pack behind the stores to Jefferson Highway, which was once planned as part of a great roadway from Manitoba to New Orleans in the early 1920’s.   The trail led a meandering course through the Elmwood Commercial Subdivision which was during the second world war a US Army logistics base named Camp Plauche.   Eventually, the hounds, or at least some of the hounds found the beer check on the levee next to the great river at Hickory Avenue.

The Circle

Religious Advisor:

Piston Penis

 

New Boots: None

 

Visitor:

Popeye, a co-hare and his mate, Just Mum who are from Chester in northern England.

 

Reboots:

Captain Commode

 

The Hares and the Trail:

The two hares are step son/step father.   It goes down hill from there.   The usual praise was declared Hash-style.   “It sucked, etc, etc...  But then Takes It InThe Face stepped up and recounted that when she asked a hare where the trail would go, she was told, “I don’t know”, or words to that effect.

Then, Popeye recounted the experience of getting lost while laying trail with Butt Gravy.   It seems that at some point, BG pointed ”that way, around that building” and when Popeye went “that way, around that building”, there wasn’t a familiar bloke to be found, nor even any unfamiliar blokes.

Anyway, with one hare lost six thousand miles from home, the other laying out flour unaware of  his co-hare’s predicament some runners and most wankers found the beer truck at river road and Hickory Avenue.

     

Naming:

Just Kim who has been hashing with NOH3 for a period of time deemed to be acceptable for a naming was called to the circle.   It seems that at the previous week’s Hash, at the On-after, she noted that Blowing Semen had a little blob of salad dressing, blue cheese salad dressing, white blue cheese salad dressing on his cheek.   It must be remembered that at a Hash, certain liberties are taken.   Just Kim felt compelled to remove the substance and when advised of the proper Hash protocol for such matters, she alllowed her motherly instimcts to take charge and licked the substance off as the hashers present felt a naming event developing.   There were other suggestions rendered but after “Come Lick Her” was proposed, all else faded out, and for ever and to hashers worldwide, she will be known as, “Come Lick Her”.

 

 

*Scribe:  On Da Rag  (Tom)

Errors? Omissions?  Send an e-mail to:

tom43cunningham@yahoo.com

Or, attend the next Hash and make arrangements

with the Religious advisor to bring it up in the circle.

 

 

New Orleans Hash House Harriers

Hash No. 977

Hare  Head Rice

Date:  16 April 2007

Venue:  Carrolton Station Cafe

in the  Carrollton Area

of New Orleans, Louisiana

 

The Trail:

On a Monday evening, cool but not cold, following a pretty day, Head Rice explained the trail marks to be found on trail that day.   Trail would be marked in the traditional way with single 'blobs' delivered with a tennis ball dipped in flour.   This method of marking trail was actually an innovation of rice's from several years past.   When the hounds took off in pursuit of the hare passing next to the Willow Street Streetcar Barn, the trail led them along narrow and picturesque streets of the burgh known as Carrollton that are as unique to New Orleans as the French Quarter.

Zigzagging through the old, tree-shaded neighborhood, of impressive big houses, tiny shotgun houses, apartment houses, a couple of universities, bars, cafes, an old cemetery and streets so quiet that one's own footsteps can be heard, the pack found the beer check at Head Rice's apartment on a building with a barn roof.

After satisfying a good thirst with beer, the hounds set out for home, the On-in, that is, back at Carrollton Station.

 

The Circle

Religious Advisor:

Piston Penis*

 

New Boots

Just Mark via Just Andy;

Just Ivana, S.L.A.H., a visitor, made her cum.

 

Visitor:

S.elf L.ubricating A.ss H.ole * and Just Ivana from Crystal Coast North Carolina;

Special Ed Giver and Sir Poop.*

 

Reboots:

Doc Cousteau and Dental Damsel, recently lawfully wedded; Releash Me and Tighty Whitey; Vagina Miner; Picks My Ass.

 

The Hares and the Trail:

The usual claims were voiced by the pack, it sucked, etc, etc, and too may Head Rice homes, more.

 

Accusations:

Although it wasn't mentioned in the circle, while Head Rice wasn't in his house (He trusted Light Days with the key.), and as we took advantage of the opportunity to dig through his stuff,  there was seen evidence of Head Rice's apparent obsessive compulsiveness (A whimsical assessment).   There on his refrigerator were a couple dozen refrigerator magnets that were advertisement of a candidate for public office.   All were identical, arranged meticulously to a perfect rectangular shape.   The shape may have been the golden rectangle proportioned with dimensions derived from the pentacle.   It was thought by one of our visitors (Either SLAH or Sir Poop, I think*) that some changes should be made.   So one of the magnets was removed and meticulously replaced perfectly where it was but upside down.   The scribe participated in that obsessive action.   Head Rice hasn't been heard inquiring of the rearranging done in his absence...

 

 

*Scribe:  On Da Rag  (Tom)

Errors? Omissions?  Send an e-mail to:

tom43cunningham@yahoo.com

Or, attend the next Hash and make arrangements

with the Religious advisor to bring it up in the circle

 

 

 

New Orleans Hash House Harriers

Hash No. 976

The Anal Divorce and End of Alimony Hash

Hare: Bleeding Paloma

Date: 9 April 2007

Venue:

Bleeding Paloma’s Digs in the Now-World-Famous area called Lakeview in New Orleans, Louisiana

 

The Trail

The weather was perfect, having warmed to the high sixties, the sun was dropping behind the trees and houses that were still standing and Bleeding Paloma delivered his chalk talc to a pack of hounds of about twenty five, a census that would grow to thirty five before On-in later.   The pack took off on Paloma’s pre-laid trail along the alley next to his house on Harrison Avenue for a couple hundred feet to an arrow that took the hounds across a lot, where the house that was there had been demolished after being flooded by Hurricane Katrina, to the next street over and on a winding course that passed, as the eagle hounds would later state, too close to the return leg.   Somewhere out there the hounds turned and found themselves at the place of the On-in but too early.   After a polite wait, they all piled into Penis Colada’s suv and auto hashed right into Hash folklore.

After the reconnected packs refreshed on some Lite beer at Beer Fart’s beer truck, all took off on trail in a return direction to a stop at Head First’s place which once had a very nice house in which she had a home but now, only the garage and screened patio which had been the site of many Hashes and beer checks before the devastation wrought by the hurricane.

From Head First’s place flour led the pack to Harrison Avenue and a few blocks back to Paloma’s place and On-in.  

 

The Circle

Religious Advisor:

Piston Penis

 

New Boots

Just Andy and Just Brandon, courtesy Just Katy who is Just Andy’s Mom.

 

Visitor:

Tool Shed, an occasional visitor from the Mother Hash of NOH3, Houston H3.

 

Reboots:

Just Joe, Jr;

Tortured Titty;

Ménage-A-Crotch;

Dip Stick;

and Just Bob and Just Marian.

 

The Hares and the Trail:

The hare, Bleeding Paloma, was asked to explain his trail, that a whole bunch of the runners had found the return leg of the trail while trying to concentrate with the distraction of a promise of beer which, because of decisions made by them, proved to be hollow.   (See accusations, below.)   Anyway, Paloma was joined by High Beams and Beer Fart and all did a down-down.

 

Accusations:

All hashers who missed chalk talk were called to the circle.   They were OCR, Just Joe Jr, Letter Licker, Ready Whip, Anal Beads, Giggles Low and Hand Job.

Auto Hasher:  Out on the trail, at the beer check as the wankers (There were many as NOH3’s membership is aging, the scribe there withstanding.) puzzled over the non-show-up-ness of the runners and ramifications of a search party, along comes Piston Penis’ truck with a hasher hanging out of each open window and one in the rear space who made his appearance when one of the others rolled out, walked to the rear and opened the tailgate.   Counted among them were Anal Beads, Piston Penis (the owner-operator), Penis Coladah, Only Oral, Just Eric and Giggles Low.   They claimed that the trail passed too close to itself and they felt a need to get on to the beer.   It was Only Oral who accused and acknowledged his participation.

Just Plain Late:  Ready Whip, Crotch Critter, Just Joe Jr, and Head Rice.

Racist Shirt: Blowing Semen was inside one.   OCR pointed that out to the assemblage.